NEW Aqua song!!

>_>

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So I'm not sure how I'm going to get through the next few weeks... it's definitely going to be a struggle. I forsee it coming and so I'm trying to gather up the energy and the patience needed to get over this last hump for a while (hopefully.) I need to find myself a full time job so I can get a steady flow of money coming in because this part time bullshit is really driving me nuts... never knowing exactly how much I'm going to be getting - some weeks an adequate amount and others a very small amount - and unfortunately this week will be the small amount... resulting is possibly not enough money for my insurance which will bounce the payment (charging me 50$ ontop of the 184$) and giving some more bad credit.

So I discovered, via a friend, a new band that I must say I really enjoy. The Temper Trap (Click me!).

They have a familiar sound, maybe a mix of some bands I enjoy that I can't entirely put a finger on... maybe some Interpol rhythm with some vocals from Sigur Ros (Without the Icelandic sexiness.)

So today I'm going to do my 6/7 day routine and go to the gym, then off to work because I picked up a shift tonight.. so I work 4-9pm which is a shitty shift... but I made a vow after yesterday's staff meeting that I'm going to be more intense about my job... even if it's just a bullshit part time job but still it's all about image and reputation here in this little town so you never know when I might need a reference or someone to pull some strings for me!

I apologize for nothing really substantial to write about lately... it's mostly because I'm just going through a rut again - really though? when am I not going through a rut these past few years. I guess it would be something different to say that I'm NOT going through a rut... that would definitely be a surprise to myself and to many.

Had a talk with my parents this morning they said I don't seem happy and that whenever I come home I go directly to my room and lock myself away - which is true. I must say I'm not fairing well with this living back home again, it's just too stressful because they haven't changed at all in the 4 years I've been away, and I've changed quite a substantial amount... and so they treat me the same. But my mother makes dinner which is nice... and wholesome.

Tonight I'm going to hang out with my friend Jay again, it's been fun hanging the past few days and just having someone to connect with... someone that's there, as Eric's said before. And I agree, it's been nice. He's going to Brazil for a month, then back to work on the cruise ship for a few more months then moving back home here in May... which seems so far away. I'm sick of waiting, and constantly being up in the air about everything, I want something substantial and someone to feel the way I feel for them - I want reciprocation and mutuality.

I also want money and to not be broke so I have something to share with someone.

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The Temper Trap: Soldier On

Who wants to know?
All that is gold, is rusted
No one will know
Seasons cease, to change, and..

How far we've gone
How far were going
So here and the now
And the love for the sound
Are the moments that keep us moving

Waves crash along
Battered lonely lighthouse
Tomorrow shes gone
And if not, some, they somehow
Are, these, hands, always

Well this side of, mortality is
Scaring, me, to death
To death

Don't think about it at all
Just keep your head low
Don't think about it at all

Soldier On
Soldier On
Keep your heart, close to the ground
Soldier On
Soldier On
Keep your heart, close, to the ground

Don't think about it at all
Just keep your head low
Don't think about it at all

Yeah..
Will you take me tonight
Yeah..
Will you take me tonight
Yeah..
Will you take me tonight

Yeah..
Will you take me tonight
Tonight

Soldier On
Soldier On
Keep your heart, close to the ground

Rihanna: Russian Roulette!

Take a breath, take it deep
Calm yourself, he says to me
If you play, you play for keeps
Take a gun, and count to three
I’m sweating now, moving slow
No time to think, my turn to go

[Chorus]
And you can see my heart beating
You can see it through my chest
And I’m terrified but I’m not leaving
Know that I must must pass this test
So just pull the trigger

Say a prayer to yourself
He says close your eyes
Sometimes it helps
And then I get a scary thought
That he’s here means he’s never lost

(Chorus)

As my life flashes before my eyes
I’m wondering will I ever see another sunrise?
So many won’t get the chance to say goodbye
But it’s too late too pick up the value of my life

(Chorus)

Bored

So I'm a tad bit (more like REALLY) bored.
I think i'm going to go to take a nap just because i can ...
Just discovered the band Bad Religion for the first time tonight and i must say i really enjoy.
So i'm going to add it as my favorite song for right now.

Other brother finishes work 12am... so i guess that's something to do there, i get to go pick him up i guess, unless my dad volunteers (which i kind of hope.)

Only work 4 hours tomorrow, but between my two jobs i work a total of 45 hours this upcoming week, which is good though i guess. And i also get tips at the one job so hopefully i might make some good money next week:

Weekly tip count: 50$?

That's not too extreme, considering i was told that waitors at the resturaunt do approx. 150$ a shift there... so i'll aim for 50$ for the week, just so i'm not let down haha.

Cute song, makes me fuzzy

Found this song randomly whilst listening to Kate Nash's album, Made of Bricks, and I thought this part was really, really, cute and really kinda illustrated in a somewhat familiar way how I feel about you.

But you already know about this song because I made you listen to it =]

Here's my favorite part:

right birds can fly so high

and they can shit on your head
yeah they can almost fly into your eye
and make you feel so scared
but when you look at them

and you see that they're beautiful

thats how i feel about you

Hehe. You know who you are, so this is my little shout-out to you indirectly in my blog! Ha! And here you can't stop me bitch.